Inching Forward

In the world of international adoption, you have to compile a dossier. It is composed of all the official documents that verify what you have already told the country you are adopting from. Birth certificates, marriage certificated, health exams, your entire homestudy, reference letters, employment forms, adoption application, background checks, immigration approval and a few I'm forgetting. They all have to be notarized, and then the notary has to be certified by the Secretary of State that it originated from, so if you have lived in multiple states, then you have multiple state background checks and they all have to be certified from those states, or birth certificates, etc... once you have those done, and ours took 3! tries, because the Secretary of State in Florida has recently become rather persnickety about notary language. Forms that were exactly the same that we used for Vivian's adoption two years ago, were rejected this time :(  We finally got that ironed out and then, they all have to go to the Chinese consulate assigned to your state, which for us meant Houston, except Michael's birth certificate, which got to go to Chicago. The consulate then verifies that the Secretary of State seal of certification, that verified the notary's seal, is indeed valid. And then! then you can send the entire package of precious documents to China to be logged in and then start the translation and  review process. We were so excited to finally be DTC (dossier to China) last month. We had been waiting to hear our hear our LID(Log in Date), and honestly, based on the vast majority of other families on the same general timeline as ours, had expected to be logged in within a week of it's arrival. Our dtc date was 9/6/12, so I was guessing maybe the 11th, or even the 18th at the latest, but we hadn't heard yet. When we finally heard the date yesterday, it was 10/8/12. I will be honest and say I almost cried. I am glad we finally are logged in. It is still progress. It's just that nothing happened from 9/6 to 10/8. You see, you aren't even in line for translation, and review, so you can move on to the next step (LOA) until you get logged in. So for those weeks, whatever the reason for the delay, that time was zero progress. I had been thinking we were logged in like all the other families who sent their dossiers at the same time, and thinking we were a little over a  month into our wait, and in reality it's only been a week.And I was sad. I just want to hold them. I want to know they are safe. I want to be grafting them in, adjusting to a family of 10.  Now, Michael, he doesn't waver. He is disappointed, maybe, but not bothered because he knows God is in control of it all. That God already knows exactly the moment and day we will hold our children in our arms. And he doesn't struggle in it. He doesn't analyze the whys, and the should have beens, and the it's not fair. I do though. I believe in my deepest soul that this is God's story. I know He has it under control. I believe He is into the details, and our dossier isn't sitting at the bottom of the pile, unknown to Him. But I still had a hard time with it yesterday, I kept thinking about it. Last night, I woke up about 4am, and immediately, I thought of this song. It was like God just played it right then out of the blue for me. And I knew, and I was reassured.  He's got this. He loves Calvin and Georgia more than I ever could. And he loves me. And this is His story, that I get to be a part of, and He isn't distracted, lol. He will move the papers at his timeline, and will provide what we need to bring them home. These mountains to me, the paperwork, and the funds we need, I can't fix. It just isn't in my control. And while sometimes it is hard realize that, I am so thankful, that I have a Father who is in control of it all.